Sunday, February 27, 2011

Reasons I get dumped - part one of many.

After much thinking, and deliberation, and a few warnings from guess who, I am pissed off.
The following are few of the reasons I have had problems with almost everyone I've flipped so far...

NOTE: This has nothing to do with my present relationship status. 

1.She thinks I'm taking her for granted.

My point of view- I can't treat her like I've just met her every fucking day. No matter how much creativity..or the lack of it that I possess, I will at some point run out of the energy to put on my best and be the enticing bastard she found irresistible.

2.She thinks I'm still hung up on "A" an ex girlfriend. OR  I'm not aware of the fact that I'm still into her.

From my point of view -  "A" called it off because she thought she wasn't good enough. She blamed "B" who blamed "C" Boo hoo. In retrospect, I could've banged A and should've done so.

3. There's no spark anymore.

From my point of view- I'm not drunk anymore.

4. I seem disinterested....and so does little junior.

 From my point of view- It's boring now, no matter how much of experimentation, modification, there will come a time when you start wondering what it would be like if you had chosen the other car know what I mean...that's just human psyche. We're programmed to get bored.

5. I'm not open with her.

From my point of view - I like to keep my feelings to myself. I like being alone. And I don't talk about my problems to anyone apart from the person who could potentially have a solution. What's the point of letting it out and not getting a solution, in the process ruining moods of other people as well?

6. I don't share.

From my point of view - I paid for it. Hence It's mine. You want one, I'll buy you one, don't touch what's on my plate. It's rude. Same logic applies to feelings.

7. I am not in touch with my feelings. 

From my point of view - LOL.

8. She feels she's tying me down.

From my point of view- It's just an excuse to go do the nasty with that guy she wanted to. If she wanted to keep up with me she would've. She did all this while. What happened now?

9. She feels she's tying me down from being with the person I'd rather be with.

Try and get your head around this one, because I haven't so far. Sorry.

10. She doesn't trust herself.

My point of view- Bullshit.What I hear is " I will hook up with that person after a wild night and then feel guilty because of you, and I can't deal with that, or get dumped by you which will make me feel worse. So it's just better this way"  Screw you. You can't keep it in your pants. That's the problem. It's just a different way of saying you have needs that one single person can't satisfy. Gee I wonder what society would call you... and of course  you wound my ego.

11. She isn't comfortable about me not getting along with her friends family etc.

My point of view- I didn't want to nail her friends(save few) or her family. I wanted her. I didn't know she came with that much baggage. Why is shocking if it doesn't make a difference if her friend got hit by an autorickshaw? I'd be the first one at the funeral. Pity it didn't happen.Wait...touchwood.

12. She feels I deserve better.

From my point of view- Eh what?? Maybe I do....someone who's on the same dynamic mental plane on which I reap my harvest of cannabis....hmm...

At the end of it all, I realize, that there's no point to being in a relationship unless you're getting married. So what's wrong if I think there's an expiry date? People can still be friends. I've been blessed that way.

Special Thanks to Kanika Kaul , Meher Manda (again) for awarding me. I'll collect them and do the needful after my exams are over. I haven't been blog surfing much anyway . But please check them out, they're both amazingly talented and have a very unique perspective on things!

Much love.


Anonymous said...

I think what they think about you is true

UjjwalRaaj said...

^And you're anonymous. How convenient.

Disguise said...

Hahahahahahahahaha. I'm sorry, you don't deserve this :)

Anonymous said...


Essay Tea said...

Number 3 deserves to be in Reader's Digest.

Essay Tea said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Vikramaditya said...

it doesn't make a difference if her friend got hit by an autorickshaw?


Anonymous said...

oh my fucking gorddddd!u might just never getta girl;)anyways,hope your '''''awesome'''' girlfriend is still ''''awesome''' :p bless u both

mehul said...

^^ she not keeping u happy?u seemed to be in a satisfactory mood anyway shit happens all the best and u got the awards i wanted to give u :) and learn how to thank people and return their comments

mehul said...

no offence though
adding you on fb :)

Soul_Fly said...

Bawahaha xD

I hope you are just pretending to be a nutshell emotionally..... xD

Aryaman said...

This is EPIC shit xD


IcE MaiDeN said...

# 3 is EPIC! :D hahhahahahha! :P

We're programmed to get bored. - SO FCKING TRUE.

A relationship is very simple - either you break up or you get married :D :)

IcE MaiDeN said...

Though I must add, all cool that I am, I do possess womanly impatience, so #5 (which ze boyfriend does all the fucking time) kind of drives me up the wall and all over to freaking Siberia. Oh god, and can I cuss! :|

Meher S B said...

Damn, it can be so demanding at time, eh?
bwahahaha, but the post was funny. =)

UjjwalRaaj said...

@Disguise: I do. Every bit of it.

@Anonymous #3: I have reason to believe I will. Women can change men. It's a fact. It's inconvenient..but still a fact.

@Essay Tea : That's a very big compliment. Very big indeed! Thank you!

@Piyush: I told you so.

@Mehul : Don't mistake resignation for satisfaction! Haha.

@Soul_Fly: Now...what happens if I actually am...?!

@Aryaman: Thanks man! And more for liking my FB page. :P

@Ice_Maiden: What if I prefer NEITHER?! Haha, I can never understand the womanly urge to weed out deep rooted emotional things :|

Thank you =)

Amour said...

This was funny when you read it out on the phone but when I read it right it's like ZOMG this is mother fucking hilarious all over again.
You bastard, EPIC SHIT.
Lol, so bloody well observed :')

Amour said...

Oh and I just read that little joke thing about the grammar. You're right. That's totally me LOL

Tanvi said...

Lol :D Hilarious post i must say..... its not your fault dude, I can understand your feelings :P Its fashionable to b single and do stuff your way.... :) Hope you get that :P Enjoy!


Amogh said...

Hahaha..aint she the one from ur fb statuses...surprising..

This was epic though...freakin hilarious~

Red Nails & Raindrops said...

I LOVE THIS! Ha ha ha it made me laugh so much, and made me cringe at the same time because I have almost broken up with my boyfriend for a few of the same reasons, luckily I realised I was being stupid before it was too late!!!

I really dig your blog... Come check mine out :)


UjjwalRaaj said...

@Amour: TOLD YOU!

@Tanvi:..hehe..I was never much of a fashionista .. :P

@Amogh: Yes she is!

@Red Nails: Well now you know better!I like your blog :)

☆ Crazy Diamond ☆ said...

all the women all over the world will have all those problems with all the men, ALWAYS!


I think men will love this post.

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